November 7th

Yesterday will be a day I never forget.

On Saturday, we had a band competition about thirty minutes away from our high school and because we had to go so early, around eight in the morning, I decided to sleep. Who wakes up so early on a Saturday? Not me that’s for sure.

Anyways, a few hours have passed since we arrived at our destination and then around two, one of my friends ask me go to with her to get something in the bus. So like the good friend I am, I went. We sat in the very back of the yellow bus where I was sitting earlier just joking around. Then she grabs this piece of paper from her gray jacket and told me to open it. Suspicious but curious, I did what I was told. Inside there were cheesy pick up lines and a question. A question that I whole heartedly said yes to.

Yesterday, was the day to end my single pringle days. Now, I’m a taken pringle with a cute girlfriend.

November!

Wow, I can’t believe it’s November already! It’s been two weeks since I lasted posted and a new month has come upon us. Many things have kept me busy like school work, band, typical high school drama etc. but hopefully I could come back to the blogging world again!

Anyways, how have you been?

Hopefully, One Day

I wish there is a world where no one is scared to say their sexuality. A world where any sexuality is accepted like gay, lesbian, bisexual, asexual, bigender, transgender etc. Wouldn’t that be amazing? That would mean no more wars and fights. No more people trying to kill them self because they are pressurized to be ‘normal.’ Lives are being taken because others can’t accept that we are human. We love who we love. Their gender is nobody business but theirs.

Please love everybody with all the good of our heart. Make the world a better place.

Shorts or no Shorts?

In elementary, I would only wear pants outside of my home. Never shorts or skirts unless it was that one time in kindergarten. You can recognize me for wearing pants in any weather at any time. I remember my classmates wondering if I was warm or not. I was. I live in Southern California! When it gets hot, it gets¬†hot.¬†Even when it’s supposed to be fall, it still feels like summer. Anyways, I had a good reason.

I believe that heavy people shouldn’t wear shorts or skirts.

I know. That is such a mean and stupid reason. I thought that since that since my fat was sticking out in shorts and skirts and I felt terrible about it, other weight people with the same problem would feel the same.

My streak of wearing only pants ended in middle school when I gain more confidence thanks to my friends. However, sometimes I would look back and think of my lack of confidence that I still don’t hundred percent-ly have. I guess I’m getting better with that.

“Who’s Right? Who’s Wrong?”

A few months ago, I gotten a haircut. It was just the similar style my mom always did. When I was a kid, I always hated my hair when it was chin length. I thought it looked terrible on me and I should just grow out my hair. Looking back at it now, it wasn’t all that bad but kid me thought it was the worst thing to happen. So every time my mom cut my hair, I would cry in the shower afterwards.

Now skip a few years, and I still get the similar haircut. However, the difference is that instead of crying over it all the time, those tear times have decreased to sometimes. Sometimes, I thought that the hair cuts would make me look like a boy and make my fat and broad shoulders show more. I still have those thoughts.

Anyways, some people thought that I look good and cute. Others, they would say I look like an aunt or a grandma. I trust these people, some of them are even close friends and family. So who’s right?

I don’t know.

There are times where I think,”I look good today,” and then pose cutely in front of a mirror.

Other times I would think,”Ugly. Ugly. Ugly. Fat. Fat. Fat.”

I look at photos and see my face that looks so different from the mirror. Maybe the mirror is deceiving me because as I look at my smile in photos, it looks so different from the smile I practice in the bathroom. My smile looks uneven and tilted unlike the nice looking one show through the reflective glass.

I shouldn’t listen to others about my appearance because only my opinion matters. However, to me other’s people about me is important. I want them to like me mainly for my personality but also my appearance. Do I look pretty to them? Do I look at least decent?

Being a human being is hard.